Introducing the Gin and Gin and Tonic

Many years ago, I, along with several collaborators who most likely would prefer to remain anonymous, invented a drink that might have revolutionized the cocktail industry. For reasons that remain hazy, we never got around to bringing it to market.

But now, for the first time, and just in time for New Year’s, I’m going to reveal the drink — and the complete instructions for how to make it. One of the beauties of this potent potable is that you can make it just about anywhere, indoors or out, regardless of ambient temperature.

We call the drink The Gin and Gin and Tonic.

How to Make The Gin and Gin and Tonic

Pictured above are the ingredients for The Gin and Gin and Tonic, and the first thing you will notice is there are seven of them. Let’s run through the list before getting into the drink preparation itself.

1. Gin, either a premium brand or an inferior brand poured into an empty premium bottle. The decision here is based on your budget and guest list. However, after six or seven of The Gin and Gin and Tonics, it won’t matter much.
2. More Gin, because gin alone is not enough for preparing a batch of The Gin and Gin and Tonic.
3. Tonic. The ratio of gin to tonic is somewhat flexible. But to maximize the taste and effectiveness of The Gin and Gin and Tonic, the proportions illustrated above make for a reliable benchmark.
4. Stainless Steel Cocktail Shaker. This is the best carrier for Part A of The Gin and Gin and Tonic, as it has excellent insulating properties and really holds a chill in the refrigerator.
5. Drinking Glass. The great debate between a tall glass (pictured) and a regular glass (not pictured) is a subject for another day. I like a tall glass.
6. Swizzle Stick. This device will be needed to stir the cocktail in the final stages of preparation.
7. Ice. Ice is a necessary component for Part B and optional for Part A. Depending on your budget, guest list and personal hygiene, you may want to add an eighth ingredient, ice tongs, to the recipe. I leave it to you.

NOTE  — You’ll notice the absence of limes from the ingredient list. The reason is deceptively simple. Limes take up too much real estate in the Shaker and Drinking Glass.

Preparing The Gin and Gin and Tonic

It all starts with Part A.

• Add Gin (Ingredient 1) and maybe More Gin (Ingredient 2) to Shaker (Ingredient 4).
• Add Tonic (Ingredient 3) to Shaker. Ratio of Gin/More Gin to Tonic is roughly 8:1.
• Optionally add Ice (Ingredient 7) to Shaker, seal and chill. What you have now is a shaker of gin and tonic, Part A. 

When Shaker is adequately chilled, commence work on Part B.

• Add Ice to Drinking Glass (Ingredient 5). Not too much.
• Add More Gin to Glass. Fill glass half way with gin.
• Fill remainder of Glass with gin and tonic from Shaker. Pouring the cold bath of gin and tonic over the iced Glass of gin is what gives The Gin and Gin and Tonic its charm. 
• Stir The fully prepared Gin and Gin and Tonic with Swizzle Stick (Ingredient 6).

Salut! 

FAQs for The Gin and Gin and Tonic

Q: What’s the difference between The Gin and Gin and Tonic and a really strong gin and tonic?

A: I’m frequently asked that question.

Q: I don’t have a swizzle stick. Can I still make The Gin and Gin and Tonic?

A: Yes, although be advised that using another implement will result in some deterioration of taste. Approved substitutes for a swizzle stick are a spoon, knife, non-bendy straw, Phillips screwdriver, finger or disposable razor.

Q: Have you considered expanding the lineup with, say, The Vodka and Vodka and Soda or The Scotch and Scotch and Water?

A: We have several new items in research and development. Things are looking good — stock up on swizzle sticks.

Any more questions?